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Sunday 12 August 2012

The Stonehenge Olympics


Forget all this stuff about the Olympic Games originating in Greece.  That's all nonsense, although out of deference to the Greek people (who have enough problems as it is) the media have kept rather quiet and have kept the truth under wraps.  The evidence shows that the Olympic Games actually have their origins in the UK, and that Stonehenge is all that is left of the first Olympic Stadium.  The Avenue was of course the first Olympic race track, and the Olympic Village, used to house all of the athletes, was at Durrington Walls.  (One can still find traces in the Durrington Walls digs of the enormous feasts held at the end of each Olympic Games by the athletes, the volunteers, and the British Olympic Committee.)

In a typical understated British way, there are clues in the Olympic programme to the real origins of the Games.  The whitewater bluestone transport time trial (shown above) is one example -- competitors are required to transport a 4-tonne lump of bluestone in a two-man dugout canoe through a raging torrent, without either drowning or incurring time penalties.  The Olympic Showjumping is another example; there can be no further doubt about the function of the Sarsen Circle and the trilithons, and Zara Phillips (shown above) was obviously greatly moved during her competition by the cultural associations and the pressure of history driving her to great things.

Then we have the Amesbury Archer and all that sort of thing.  Some archaeologists have gone to great lengths to prove that some of the archers whose remains are found in the Stonehenge area lived in the Alps, or France, or Scotland, or Wales.  There is no problem with any of that.  It is self-evident that they were all far-travelled competitors in one of the Olympic Archery finals of somewhere around 4,000 years ago.  And they had nice teeth too, just like Mo Farah.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I say, Brian, there could be something in this. Rather glad you kept quiet about it BEFORE The London Olympics, mind, as you might have stolen our thunder!


BORIS JOHNSON

Myris of Alexandria said...

The middle triliton of the jump is a one to one scale model of last year's grim Preseli finds. The architect of Stonehenge is still with us and active
room mate of Elvis??
The model will be up for sale in the big Olympic sell-off.
M

Jon Morris said...

An excellent new theory Brian!

This fits in well with the idea that there were giants and titans back in the old days; thus helping to explain quite a few myths.

Tony H said...

Myris

Elvis has now transmogrified into "Stonehenge-Ylvis", according to the latest 'Current Archaeology', Sept 2012, page 20. Search for the above 2 words on Google, and, we are told, there's an amusing video about a NORWEGIAN rock star of that name who has everything. Yet, despite this, he can get no peace of mind because he is tormented by a nagging question: 'What is the meaning of Stonehenge?'

By the way, this is an article by Chris Catling summarising the latest thinking on said monument (pp 20- 27). It's a handy summary (including quite a few of its photos and illustrations) of MPP's new June 2012 Stonehenge book.

Tony H said...

"It is self-evident that they were all far-travelled competitors in one of the Olympic Archery finals of somewhwere around 4,000 years ago. and they had nice teeth too, just like mo Farra".

Has any research been done to find out (by finding remnants of bow - string [made of honeysuckle twine perhaps] BETWEEN the teeth, for example) whether the competitors might have used those exceptionally fine, strong teeth to DRAW BACK the bow, Cupid-style?? I'll throw that one out, shot-like, to the boffins of the United Kingdom of Stonehenge to answer.

Tony H said...

Horsewoman Zara, pictured at the mock Stonehenge jumps, also must feel a strong affiliation with the trilithons and the sarsen stones. She grew up in the countryside just outside Chippenham, Wiltshire. Perhaps she has ancestral DNA from the Neolithic? It's over to you, boffins.

chris johnson said...

I suppose this is the basis of MPP's view, that effort however pointless would be valued and help the individual gain status.

Many Olympic sports today are rewarding the ability of the individual to process lactic acid and manage their pain. A lot of science is devoted to this and ice baths utilised to improve recovery.

I find Brian's post to be a solid support for the human transport lobby. Never underestimate the capacity of a human being to perform extremely painful and pointless activity to win status. The British Olympians confirm this: working 28-32 hours per week to the point of physically vomiting. All for vanity, and the vague hope of a PR or modelling contract, applause, and self validation.

Good job boys and girls, but the well paid BBC pundits come from a generation when we were lucky to win 1 gold medal (Atlanta) and thanks to success of Team GB, supply now exceeds demand.

Anonymous said...

The Stonehenge Riverside Project Team is investigating a possible henge and a suspected causeway used in the transport of sarsen stone from the Marlborough area to Stonehenge in August.

I think it's a waste of time but no doubt they will find what they are looking for...

PeteG

Tony H said...

What PeteG says about the henge & suspected causeway etc is detailed, for those interested, at:

hppt://www.wiltshire heritage.org.uk

Then go to "What's On"

WAHNS AFG members are helping.Hope to be able to report further soon.

They've already made a very interesting start.



Anonymous said...

I'm a WANHS member and live around the corner from the museum but I only ever get to hear what WAHNS AFG members are up to after the event.
Last year I was asked to help photograph Saxon meeting places in the area and didn't hear another word until after it was all over.
I reluctantly updated my membership recently but I doubt I will next year. £38 is a lot for one book and a leaflet, especially during a recession.

I only got to hear about the Clatford dig after a local asked me about it recently!
PeteG

Tony H said...

Pete

I suggest you look at the WANHS AFG info material on-line at the Wiltshire Heritage Museum's website. If you've updated your membership for this year, you could also contact the AFG direct and asked to be kept informed of AFG events.
This Clatford [near Marlborough] dig has only very recently been made common knowledge to AFG members like me. I heard about it via a general email from the Marketing Officer,Karen, on approx Friday, August 3rd.
The bulk of the digging team so far is made up of archaeology students, with a handful of WANHS AFG members taking part.
General WANHS members have the opportunity, after booking, to attend Site Visits on the coming weekend. Non-members may also book places (limited to 25 per day).

Tony H said...

PeteG

Your mention of being asked to help photograph Saxon meeting places, or moots, in Wiltshire: this was/is an on-going moots project. The leader of this project was working a great distance away from Wiltshire and communications were stretched to ALL of us for a while. Your help and expertise might still be appreciated with your camera. This is/was a National Moots Project co-ordinated by University college London (Andrew Reynolds). There will no doubt be other mentions of the Wiltshire Moots Project via the AFG over time.