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Wednesday, 16 December 2020

Experimental archaeology: staggering new experiment reveals truth about Stonehenge bluestone transport


News has just reached us of a staggering new experiment conducted in conditions of some secrecy,  at a location in the heart of Bluestone Country, during the Pandemic lockdown.  Purely by chance, the Bluestone Brewery is not very far away.  A carefully selected team of stone pullers,  chosen for their strength and ingenuity, was assembled and after a detailed briefing from a senior archaeologist who shall be nameless, they embarked upon what must surely be the definitive piece of Stonehenge experimental archaeology.  It’s great to see some serious scientific work at long last, after all that storytelling. 

The stills above are taken from a rigourously  assembled video film of the experiment, which will no doubt find its away into the National Museum archives.

From an intensive examination of the footage, we can safely say that we now know what actually happened all those years ago. First, find your stone and give it a good wash. Next, have a few beers. Next, build your sledge and get the stone onto it with the aid of a JCB. Next, move it about 50 yards, or until you get thirsty, whichever is the greater.   Next, try to move it to Stonehenge.  Next, give up in disgust. Next, stick it up in the field where you found it, with the help of the JCB.  Next, potter off and have a few more beers. Now you know.

The full scientific paper relating to this enterprise will in due course be published in Antiquity, or the Sun or some other learned publication.  We look forward to that.


Tonyh said...

"Right said Fred......."

Dave Maynard said...

Are you in the video in some disguised form?

BRIAN JOHN said...

Nothin' to do with me, Guvnor! Although I am credited with being a stunt man, I knew nothing at all about this exciting experiment. Was there some impostor involved, I wonder? Maybe time will tell..........